So THIS is 40

You thought you would be happy or successful by now, but something is missing. You’re burnt out, jaded and drained just trying to get through life and your obligations, keep the peace and make everyone happy while living through unprecedented time after unprecedented time, that continues to chip away at what you do have literally AND figuratively. You want to do something about it but you don’t know exactly where to start because you’re also burnt out over the influx of inspiration overload throughout the internet about this ONE thing that’s going to solve all of your specific problems because the algorithm be algorithming 😩

Girl, I get it. I have been there too and the struggle is REAL on wanting to scream, but feeling stiffled, because the irony is that you want, no, you NEED peace and quiet. There’s so much noise, that you can’t even distinguish your own inner wisdom or true desires within it. And you’re too tired from running, whether it be away from something or towards it, to even remember why you’re running in the first place.

That’s exactly where I was when I got laid off from my absolute dream job 11 months into it and faced the very real threat of losing the livelihood I had so meticulously manifested from my dreams, despite the countless obstacles and hurdles encountered to get there. 

Baby, the tables were shaking when after spending an entire week (most after hours) pouring into and demoing to much praise and excitement, my amazing programs and initiatives I was set to launch the very next week, only to sign in on a Friday morning and learn that my Bank had been shut down by the FDIC.

For 2 months (and beyond) I endured living through a traumatic experience riddled with, misinformation, public opinion and being on the other side of a sensationally trending hashtag with no clarity on the future of my role, even though I could see the writing on the wall.  

I did all of the usual things one does when facing that reality and had been updating my resume and brushing up on my LinkedIn presence only to find that I was part of an ever growing community of qualified professionals laid off across company after company during an economic downturn. These job seeking streets were no joke, so I did what was within my control and started pursuing my Data Science Machine Learning Certification and strengthened my relationships with fellow colleagues, while waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop.  

I was actually RELIEVED when my alarm went off to wake up for the day while simultaneously getting that cold ass email telling me my journey had ended and the new bank would be moving forward without me and about 500 other passionate and competent individuals who were dedicated to attracting and retaining talent. I was initially relieved because I no longer had to carry the weight of wondering if AND when I would be losing my job, which meant I could more easily more forward. Within the next few hours, myself and others would say our goodbyes over email and instant messages, before getting promptly shut off and shut out of the systems, programs and initiatives we’d so lovingly cultivated and fostered.

Just like that, all of my hard work from the prior 11 months deemed no longer necessary, and ME by extension, no longer valued and now quietly erased from the story.

My world had quite literally been turned upside down, my trust in the “system” and the supposed help available shattered. But even worse, I was broken.

You see, I spent so much of my life, molding myself into what I thought I needed to be to have that “better” quality of life, the “American Dream” if you will, that I didn’t really know anything beyond it. I didn’t know what direction I wanted to go in, because I had no true sense of direction other than to run away from the financial insecurity that plagued 3 quarters of my life towards the quality of life afforded to the higher classes intentionally reserved for people who don’t look like me.

I was in my 40th year on earth, the summer of Beyoncé Renaissance was coming and I at least had enough saved up to get me through the end of the year worse come to worst. The prospect of having to live off of my savings that I had been planning to use towards paying off the expensive ass remodel I had ironically just completed because I “had made it” (or so I thought), definitely wasn’t ideal. But the week of my Layoff, I made the intentional decision to simply enjoy my summer, quiet the noise, do nothing but what gave me joy and reclaim my time (within reason of my finite funds 🙄)

I needed to get to what Chey wanted, without the influence of being on the tight rope this country sets you on along with the cacophony of opinions of people who think they know better than you as guardrails to keep you on (while knocking off your balance) or distract you from what YOU truly need and desire.

Mecca in Puerto Viejo, Costa Rica where I got MUCH of my rest and relaxation needed to start the REAL healing. Please support this amazing Black Woman-Owned Hotel! Find my review and other here.

I started to SEE things for what they truly were, which allowed me to tune into what I wanted and needed for my life and what I needed to let go off. 

I started to SAY out loud what it was that I wanted and needed to myself and people I trusted so that I not only hold myself accountable, but so I could properly set my intentions into the universe to manifest the energy and tools needed to support me. 

I started to KNOW better because I was leveraging the formal and informal education I’d received from the different training programs I was in, lessons learned through the obstacles and challenges I encountered daily, as well as resources I came across through research and targeted marketing. Oh yes, I was now making those algorithms work for ME.

When you KNOW better, You DO better and because of that, I was not only handling life’s challenges and obstacles with greater ease, because let’s face it, like death and taxes, challenges and obstacles are a constant, (further heightened by where you fall within the privilege spectrum.)I had learned to live more in my Thrive energy vs. Threatened and welcomed the opportunities to learn and GROW.

To sustain my GROWTH, I put in measures to ensure that I had the Resilience to remain in Thrive energy while boosting my power to activate it more quickly when life would do what it does.

The more I practiced these skills, the better I got and it allowed me to tap into what I’ve wanted all along:

Find and keep peace and fulfillment by authentically living an Integrated life aligned to my values and principles, operating from my sage energy & sweet spot, self – aware and centered in my wellbeing (all 8 Dimensions), nurtured by a Strong Support System that I would also serve and pour back into so that we ALL could grow. I know that may sound like word salad, but there really is science behind it and I can’t wait to tell you all about it.

Those who know me, know how much I need the math to math. Ever wonder why it feels like you’re on a never ending roller coaster no matter how hard you work or what you achieve? It’s because there’s instability to the drivers of sustainable Peace and Fulfillment.

When you work with me, I will make sure you are solid in your understanding of these drivers when it comes to YOUR blue print, while empowering you to own and operate them like the Sage you are!

Whether you work directly with me or not, I’ll be sharing the Seeds of WizDoom that I’ve picked up along the way so you can continue to grow, flourish and help the next!

Thank you for reading.

With much love and gratitude,

Cheyennis Doom